Sometimes, hearts really break
by mrs-ishida
Summary: ClaudexMiguel. yaoi. Claude walks in on something heart breaking- and it makes him pull his act together about Miguel. But is he too late to save him? Contains rape and suicidal thoughts.
1. Default Chapter

HELLO AGAIN!!! This is pretty heavy and a lot darker than my other stories. I hope that it makes you think a little about anything. This switches POV a lot – between Claude and Miguel. (first section has no POV).

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Have you ever sat back and took a long hard look at the way you live your life? I'm willing to bet that you never have. What meaning does one persons life have in the great scheme of things? Not a lot. So why should it even matter anyway? Is mankind so weak, that to exist, we need to have a purpose? Why can't we except that our purpose in life is purely to see?

Because sometimes, our hearts need the love of someone else to keep beating.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm here again. In the place that no one can hurt me.

But I'm afraid I might be lost. There's a pain in my chest which I think I may have caused myself. It feels like I'm dying.

My eyes are damp, but I'm not sure that the fluid around them are tears. It's far too thick. It smells and tastes like copper. I think it's blood.

I'm so lonely.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Claude opened the door marked 'BBA revolution' and timidly smiled at the faces he was greeted by.

"Have any of you seen Miguel?" His heart sank when all the meaningless faces shook their heads.

"Is he in trouble?" Came a girls voice.

"I think he's dying" Claude muttered.

"Pardon?" Did you say you think he's dying?"

"No. I'm gonna kept trying. See ya" Claude shut the door and leant against it. He had to think about every breath he took, other wise his body would forget to take in oxygen. He'd walked in on something awful earlier that day, and it was tearing him apart. But amongst all of his own pain and confusion, he harbored a deep concern for Miguel.

_Poor Miguel was being…. He was…. Mr. Barthez had been…. Oh god! For how long? How long for? Miguel….._

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There's a bird up there. Look. I don't think it likes me. I think animals can tell, can tell when someone is dirty. When someone needs to die.

I'm not sure I want to die like this, but what other option do I have? Claude knows now. He's probably running round all the teams and telling them about it. Hottest gossip of the century this is.

I never liked it when he touched me. I just…. didn't know how to make him stop without causing myself more pain.

_I just wanted to feel wanted._

Why was Claude the one who had to find us? Why Claude?

_Why couldn't Claude have been the one to want me?_

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Sorry Claude, I hope you find him soon. I wish I could have been more helpful" Rei's voice was surprisingly soothing to Claude, but nothing could calm his hopeless desperation.

"Wait a minute! I was in the lift with him about an hour ago! He seemed really upset, in fact, I think he was crying!" Said Mariah.

"Where did he get off?" Claude yelled. The first flicker of hope teasing him.

"I got off first. But he was going up. So he must be on the top floor or the roof!" Claude turned on his heel and ran without as much as a 'thank you'.

_I'll help you through this Miguel. I know you would never have done that unless he made you! I know it. And I know you. And I love you. Please don't die. I need you!_

Claude jumped in the lift and pushed Tala out of it.

"You got a fucking death wish frenchy?" An angry Tala exclaimed as the doors closed. "I'll get you later for this you piece of shit." Claude reached into his pocket and with drew a blood stained hankie.

_Your body is trying to self-terminate. You've been trough more pain than it can cope with. Just hold on. I'll make everything better. I'll love you like you need to be loved. _

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I don't feel as heavy as I used to. I feel so light, I could fly!

_When did I end up with no one?_

I can't see anything but red at the moment, so I better not fly today. And my chest is kinda imploding. I can feel the concave in my ribs. They'll snap soon and stab me. I won't have to jump. My body is doing everything for me.

_Why not a girl? Why did he sleep with me? Why can't I ever loose him from my thoughts?_

_Why doesn't Claude love me?_

_--------------_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He opened the lifts door and stepped out onto the roof. The wind hit him like a ton of bricks, and his baggy pants nearly blew him to his doom. Claude scanned the area, and his eyes rested on a curled up figure surrounded by a pool of blood.

"Miguel!" He ran over as fast as his body would let him and collapsed by Miguel. "Speak to me!" Miguel twisted around to face Claude and smiled.

"You're too late Claude." Blood poured from his eyes and mouth, and he was grasping at his chest. Claude pulled his hands away to find that Miguel's rib cage was dipping inwards quite dramatically. "You're always too late to save me."

"I didn't know what he was doing! God, if you just spoke to me!"

"Why did you bother to come?"

"To save you! You're fucking dying Miguel!" Claude bent down closer to Miguel to start to pick him up. In one fluid movement, Miguel tugged on Claude's top – ripping it slightly – and kissed him. Kissed him so desperately, so deeply, with so much love and emotion, with all of his pent up feelings and pain and fear.

That it killed him.

Miguel broke away from Claude, and flopped to the ground. Claude panted and brought his fingers to his lips, hot tears cascading down his face. There was a slight creaking noise, and the base of Miguel's chest concave twitched, threatening to snap inwards at any given moment.

"I love you Miguel" All Claude could do was watch helplessly and pray.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I hope you liked it so far! I'll update soon if I get enough people saying I need to!


	2. chap2

Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! I love getting feedback! But then who doesn't? I still might add another chapter to this- but when you get to the end of this one- I think you'll realize what kind of chapter it would be! Lol. If this is what you wanna read though- say so in your review- should you be so kind to leave one. Enjoy this twisted tale as best you can!

-

Claude tasted the copper on his lips left by Miguel's kiss, a savored it. For a few glorious moments, he forgot about the fact Miguel was dying, and danced around inside his mind with happiness and joy. After all, Claude had been waiting what seemed like the better part of his life to get kissed by Miguel, in all fairness, it's only human of him to need some time to absorb this event fully. And absorbing it felt good.

However, all good things must come to an end, and Claude's few seconds of happiness ended as soon and as suddenly as they had begun. Miguel lay motionless before Claude, the blood pouring from his mouth and eyes began to stop flowing. Claude didn't understand weather this was because of his confession after the kiss, and that Miguel wasn't dying anymore; or because he had in fact just died.

Claude lightly shook Miguel, but snapped his hands away when his chest concave moaned.

_So my confession didn't stop it happening. I was too late. If only I was minutes earlier, I could have saved his life._

"MIGUEL!" He screamed hopelessly and beat the ground. He needed to hold Miguel close to him. To whisper goodbyes and fair wells softly into his ears. But the concave forbid him to do anything of the sort. Even if Miguel was truly dead- Claude didn't want to be the one to stab him in the heart. "Why?" He sobbed, brushing tears away with his sleeve. "Why you? Why didn't you ever tell me? I would have stopped him. I would have killed him!"

"Could you really bring yourself to kill me Claude?" Said a cool voice from across the roof top. Claude turned sharply, to see that Mr.Barthez was leaning against the lifts door.

Claude hurled himself forward in a blind rage. Tears falling. Blood boiling. Heart revealing in its new found hate for everything apart from Miguel. Barthez simply raised his right arm, and Claude just managed to stop running in time to come face to face with the barrel of a gun. He stepped back- stunned- and silently panicked.

"You're very upset Claude, but don't make the mistake of taking your anger out on me."

"How could you do those things to Miguel? Are you really that heartless?" Claude forgot about the gun pointing at him, and proceeded to pour his heart out. "You evil bastard! Monster! Pedophile! You sick, twisted old man!" He spat the words at Barthez with pure venom and hate.

"Such ugly words from such a pretty face." Barthez smirked, which made Claude growl in anger. "I'm guessing by your reaction to this, that you loved the little bitch." Claude's skin crawled when Barthez referred to Miguel in such a way. "Oh sorry Claude, don't you like me talking about him in such a way? We had lots of different names for each other- or more accurately- I had lots of names for each other. The little bitch had to call me by what I wanted or BOOM!" Barthez raised his gun up as if he had just shoot Claude and laughed.

"I cherished him. Damn you for taking him away from me!"

"So it is love. How did it feel to walk in on us then? Must have broken your heart!" He laughed again which made Claude's blood boil inside his veins. He felt his fists clench into tight balls, and a sharp tug at his chest.

_What? Why is my heart acting like this? _

"Well, now bitch is dead, I guess I'm gonna have to look else where. And it looks like you're that else where Claude. How about it? I'll even let you call me Miguel."

"My whole body will resist you"

"That's a shame. It's not as fun when I have to hold a gun to your head though out the whole thing. But you'll give up. Just like Miguel did. You'll let me sooner or later just do what I want."

Barthez grabbed Claude's neck and swung him round, throwing him up against the lifts door. He then slammed his hands either side of Claude's head and used his body to pin him. The gun now rested a few feet away from them on the floor. Barthez didn't need it. He was thrice as strong as Claude.

All Claude could see was Barthez's fast approaching face. He tried to push him away using his free hands, but it was a vain.

_Please no. Please stop. Not like this. Oh god, please not like this._

Barthez's hot, musky breath made Claude gag- he was inches away from Claude's lips and then stopped advancing.

"Hum… I still recon Miguel was cuter. Looks like both of us will be pretending the other one is Miguel!" Claude looked away from him in disgust. Barthez grabbed his face and brought him back under his gaze. Still holding his jaw in an iron grip, Barthez brought himself down onto him and licked Claude's lips. After this, he locked his whole mouth over Claude's.

_I…I…mean nothing anymore…_

"You taste like blood Claude! Why?"

_Miguel…You did kiss me. You really kissed me. You loved me back…_

"…Miguel…"

"You mean you had a parting kiss? And I missed it! Man am I pissed off"

"Not as pissed off as I am!" There was a loud bang and Barthez flopped forward onto Claude. He stepped away finding that Barthez was no longer pinning him, and Barthez smacked down onto the ground.

"Are you okay Claude?" Miguel stood before him- completely coated in blood- with a gun resting in his hands. Barthez's gun. Claude looked down to Miguel's chest and discovered that the concave have gone.

Claude leapt onto Miguel and hugged and held him like he belonged to him, and Miguel held him back in the same fashion.

_He came back. It worked. Confessing after all this time really did work!_

"I love you too Claude! Dear god, I love you too!" Miguel pulled out of Claude's grip slightly and looked at him eye to eye. "Thank you for saving me in time." Claude looked down.

"I didn't save you in time. I didn't save you from Barthez and if I was looking harder, I could have stopped it…" Miguel rested his forehead on Claude's, and Claude looked back up at Miguel, finding him only inches away.

"I don't care. It's in the past- old news. I think I'm more interested in the new news." Miguel smiled and held onto Claude tighter.

_I can't believe this is actually happening._

There was a ping and a rolling sound- followed by shocked yelling. The two boys tore away from each others gaze and looked towards the lift. The doors were now open and Lee, Kevin and Rei all stood awkwardly in the door way.

"We just came to check up- we got worried you see." Rei started. The two boys stared daggers at the Chinese guys. "But it looks like you're alright- apart from both being coated in blood- so we'll just be off then" Kevin slammed the button in the lift as soon as Rei said this, and the lift disappeared.

"I think we scared them Claude"

"I concur. But they do have a point, we are coated in blood. Lets go clean up first…" Claude began to walk over to the lift, but Miguel grabbed his wrist and held him back. Claude spun round and gazed into Miguel's pain riddled eyes.

"Not yet. I need this. I need love. I need you."

_I forgot that he almost died from lack of love._

Claude wrapped Miguel's arms around his neck and swung his legs and back up. Miguel giggled, and leaned into Claude's chest. He walked over to the lift and Miguel pressed the button.

"It won't be long. Where do you wanna go?"

"Anywhere."

Claude shifted how he held Miguel a little bit, and kissed him. But this kiss was very different to they last one. It wasn't desperate, it was loving. It wasn't pent up, it was gentle. It wasn't painful- it was pure bliss.

And it still tasted like blood.


End file.
